Friday, November 30, 2007

BABIES, CONCERT, AND THE BEST DAY AT SCHOOL I'VE HAD ALL YEAR


This is NOT Amanda . . . .yet
So now you've seen our little bean. It was absolute MURDER holding it in and keeping it from the blog--its all we think about, talk about, or want to write about. Finally, now we can. BG (baby Goldsmith) or "the bean" is, currently, 13 weeks old (in utero of course . . .today actually marks 13 weeks on the spot). He/she now has, at this point in their development, fully functional kidneys, liver, and heart. Also, it has fingerprints. This is cool. We wanted to wait for the first trimester to be over before we wrote, but this seemed impossible to do. And, BG's nannie respectfully asked if we could wait on the announcement until she had her final mammogram--this way she could tell her family she was cancer free AND was going to be a Nannie. We honored her request. Yesterday, she had her final mammogram, and she is indeed "okay." And she gets to tell everyone about her grandkid. Amanda has been horrendously sick for most of the tenure of the pregnancy, feeling tired, nauseous, and shaky, in her words, 95 percent of the time. She has no appetite, and throws up most things anyway, but she is doing awesome trying to get as much protein as she can. We go next week for our next appointment with Bjarni (jar-nee) who is the midwife we see at the OB office. Now we'll be posting a lot more about the little bean.


*******


The concert went extremely well, and I did two 40 minute sets. My voice was very tired and dead at the end, since I havent performed like that for a while (thats what she said). A great turnout too, including some parents, twin sisters who brought their father for his birthday, Winslow alumni from as far back as 4 years ago, neighbors, faculty members, two brothers--about whom I will refer to after, a ton of seniors, and two kindergartners who are dating. I got to debut a few new ones, including a song called "the world to come," which is a song I wrote after being inspired at our first ultrasound. Some other crowd favorites included "Acadia," "Untitled," "Pauly Kober: He Loved to Rock," and "Lover's Hand." It is always such a rush/blessing to play these shows for students, who come back to school on a FRIDAY to PAY MONEY to hear my music. Quite surreal. One girl, who goes to college, even wants to use my song to write an interpretive dance for her "choreography" final coming up. Awesome.


********


There are two boys at Winslow High School who have reputations which precede them. We'll call them Ricky and Jeremy. They are the archetype of the type of kid who hates school--they were expelled last year, in fact. They seem to find their way into all sorts of trouble with teachers and administration, always serving detentions, etc. I happen to have both of these young men in class, and I have nothing but good things to say about them. I can't speak for all their teachers, of course, but, for me, they are a pleasure. They have obviously had a difficult upbringing, and they live in abject poverty. Amazingly, they both showed up at my concert tonight at 7--kids who hate school so much they got expelled last year go out on a Friday night . . . back to school . . . .and pay 8 bucks between the two of them to see me in concert?


This was the best day I have had at school in probably a year, and it had NOTHING to do with curriculum, assessment, special ed, data, IEPs, tests, or content. It had to do with relationships. I was thrilled upon seeing them, sought them out, shook their hands, and made conversation. In between sets they would come up to me, explaining how beautiful they thought a song was, quoting lyrics they enjoyed, and introducing themselves to my wife, offering their congratulations on our pregnancy. After the show, they stuck around and Richie explained how much "Paulie Kober" had touched him; he had tears in his eyes as he explained how his "real mom" died of cancer years ago. I gave him a CD on the spot, and told him to go home and listen to more. The crowd . . . compliments I got on a great set . . .making lots of money for the senior class . . . .having people laugh at my stupid jokes . . . .all of this PALED in comparison to the conversations I had with Jordan and Richie tonight--tough kids with a tough background who live a tough life who, just crazily enough, were inspired by the music I could share. I truly thank God for the gift to be able to do this.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

(Taken at 10 weeks . . .now we are at 14 weeks)

Some things leave even me at a loss for words . . . . .


Wednesday, November 28, 2007

They Let Me Out Of The Mental Ward For The Weeknd!

The "Amanda Interiors" Inc.






Amanda is so good at decorating for the holidays. On Sunday, even though she wasnt feeling well, she got all the boxes of holiday crap and started going to town on the mofo house. The only things not done yet are the tree (we will do this next Friday before our party) and the outside lights (we will do those this weekend). Amanda really knows how to bring out the "charm" of our house, and she does very well at the Christmas scenes. My favorite things are our Nutcrackers--these used to be Amanda's, but then she married me and they became ours. Some of them are very valuable originals from Germany, and when I went to buy her one last year for Christmas, I was shocked to see how much they were. So she got scratch tickets instead. Just kidding.


Our little ceramic tree is a family heirloom, I guess you could say. My mom made it in ceramics class when I was still a baby. I used to love it when I was a kid, and now we have it. Is it just me, or did every mom, from between the years of 1977 and 1982 take ceramics class? Do they still offer it?


We have handmade MERRY CHRISTMAS blocks and a little snowman family made by Ensign Bucky Walters (grandpop) that we put out. These, too, are a tradition, since he makes them for all his grandkids and kids.


I feel very blessed to have been brought up Christian, yet still honor and respect the Jewish holidays--my Dad is Jewish so this was a bonus. A few years ago, we received this beautiful Menorah from Dad, and its funny, because, when we are in the midst of Hanukkah, Amanda asks "hon are we doin' Hanukkah tonight?" Like its the dishes. Obviously, she does not understand the struggles of my people. For, every day is Hanukkah to us half Jews


Check out our manger scene. One of Amanda's roommates in college was named Zeke. This was short for Andrea. She didnt own any shoes; she wore either Tevas or rollerblades around campus. Anyway, her father is a harrier, which is a fancy name for someone who makes horseshoes and horse stuff like that. Anyway, for a wedding gift, we were given a manger scene with characters made completely out of horse tack-nails. There has to be a pun there someplace.


Soon we'll put the tree up and I cannot wait. It will be great to get all the ornaments out, argue about where to put them, and vacuum up ubiquitous spruce needles from the floor. Are you a real tree person, or are you lame? We are real tree people. It smells great, and supports the Maine economy.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Welcome To The World

Aden Robert Hargrove was born last night at 8:30 to our dear friends Jesse and Ciara. He weighed in at 6 pounds 9 ounces, and he has more hair than me already--about 50 percent more in fact. We went to visit the new parents tonight at the hospital, and they were kind enough to let us hold this little peanut man. Ciara looks totally natural as a mom, feeding the little guy like a champ. Also, she delivered with no drugs whatsoever. Congratulations guys!

Only 3 more days until my big concert. Hopefully this brings in a lot of money for the senior class, as it is one of their primary fundraisers. I have been rehearsing some new stuff, and tomorrow I'll play a little for some of my classes--its fun. They love hearing my music, which is very endearing, and then we talk about the lyrics and the music form, so it ends up being a literature discussion. To me, its "language arts" in its purest form. Even though Fuzzy will no doubt make a comment about how I am wasting the taxpayers money (wah wah wah)





Monday, November 26, 2007

Piss and Moan



Did you ever just have one of those days where you started in a bad mood and then things just exacerbated themselves throughout the day? Today was one of those days. I think it all started because I didnt sleep a wink last night. Plus I was sick for the last half of the Thanksgiving vacation.


1. I am overdue for an inspection sticker (January was when I was due). My luck finally ran out as I got pulled over last Tuesday on my way to school. The problem is that I cannot get my sticker because the ABS light in my truck is on. This light refers to the anti lock brakes, but there is nothing wrong with my brakes--its a computer error in my "operating system" or whatever. What kills me is that some cars dont even have anti lock brakes to begin with, and they drive around and can get inspection stickers with no problem. But because I have those brakes, I have to be penalized.


2. I'm tired of all English classes being so damn big . . .classes of 25 students, while other "upper level" disciplines have like 9 or 10 kids. What kills me is how we spend millions of dollars on a renovation, and, for some reason, I cannot find a computer lab to take my students--two of the "labs" are actual classes, and the library is full with study hall kids. The portable carts only have 16 computers . . .this helps me out when I have a class of 25. Then I get ridiculous comments like "well the cart only has 16 computers . . .how did you end of with 25 students??" And they chuckle. Only its not funny because its been this way for me every year


3. Marie Osmond needs to get on that plane with Rosie ODonnell, Rachel Ray, and Oprah, and fly into the sun and quit bothering people. Amanda is watching DANCING WITH THE IDIOTS right now, and she is SO BAD. All plastic surgery, fake, annoying, and she cannot take criticism . . .she tells all the judges they are wrong. I know all this . . .does this mean I watch the show?? hmmm . . . .


4. Its raining, and its that annoying rain that just annoys you as you walk around in it. So why am I walking around in it?


5. I went to the dentist, and although I like my dentist (she is a UNH alum after all) I have to get teeth extracted and I have a cavity. So I have that to look forward to.


6. We ate dinner at Subway tonight, and the people who worked at this one were idiots. Two kids worked their butts off (albeit wicked slow) while the "manager" was on the phone with "corporate," ignoring the needs of the customer. They needed to know how many roast beefs they had sold, so they could do some fancy friggin spreadsheet


7. I dont like my pants


8. I think thats it. Sorry to piss and moan. Its kind of a snowball effect thing. Ya know? I'll no doubt get some comment from "the makers of mydol" or something like that. Thats cool. Pour it on.


By the way . . . .Michelle, Steve, June, et al . . . .I didnt catch the game . . . .did the Eagles beat the Patriots?? I cant remember . . .can you tell me??


he he he

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Even Best Friends Fight Now and Then . . .

Thomas and his cousin Chelsea are the best of friends; anyone would agree. But Chelsea is quite the playful creature (she really is still a puppy) and Thomas is more of an older, more cultured, more cosmopolitan type of genteel. They love to nap and sniff and eat and beg for the same foods, but sometimes, Thomas just needs his "alone time" so he can catch up on his reading or his Masterpiece Theater. So, naturally, he defends himself. The twist is that Chelsea thinks this is Thomas "playing" (which he very may be . . .I mean, who can really understand animals, right?). So, Chelsea fights right back, thinking it is part of the game. Its really funny when Chelsea, inspired by her cousin Thomas, begins to think she, too, is a cat, and "swipes" at Thomas with her paws. Funny stuff.

Thomas has no front claws. No animals were harmed in the making of this movie.

After, the two made up, and Thomas even "groomed" Chelsea a little bit, licking her paws for her, etc.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! As I am writing this, it is Friday (yesterday was much to busy to blog) and Kris, Anthony, and Sally are putting up the Favry Christmas tree. Chelsea is asleep at my feet and Thomas is asleep on the couch in the living room, basking in the sunshine. The "XM Pops" channel is broadcasting beautiful sacred choral and classical Christmas music, and we are all pleasantly full on a beauteous Thanksgiving dinner from yesterday, as well as the breakfast from which we just returned (its a tradition each year that Ortiz takes everyone out for breakfast on the Friday after Thanksgiving). There are just so many "stories" to report on from the holiday that I just couldnt possibly include them all. Let's see . . .

We made pretty good time on Wednesday's drive, arriving in Ledyard around quarter to 8. Amanda the Panda made her Panda Pumpkin Pie (see pic) while Twon concocted some delicious adult egg nog beverages for the two of us. Amanda and Kristin were mature (as usual) while Anthony and I got silly. So, we did the natural thing . . .we listened to some New Kids on the Block that I downloaded for Amanda on our iPod



Everyone seems to have their "signature dish." For me, its my "Kemish beans," for Sally its her desserts and baking, and for Anthony, its his amazingly decadent stuffed mushrooms. I have tried to replicate the recipe several times, but I cannot come close. Delicious Anthony . . .thank God you made them, or Ortiz would have stayed home! Anthony made a 26 pound turkey, which he brines in his special marinade. The only unfortunate part about it was that we were so full on delicious appetizers like stuffed shrooms, Joanne's pepperoni bread, cheese, crackers, and Honey Dew donuts that I wasnt as hungry as I should have been for the turkey and fixings. But I came through as I always do. And so did Panda Pie. Ortiz did the honor of carving the turkey, and even though he yelled at me because I asked him a question while he carved, we made up later by exchanging big hugs . . .ha ha. One of the other yearly traditions (is that redundant?) is that I "dispose" of the carcass by throwing out in the woods in back of their house. Happy Thanksgiving raccoon family!



It was great so see everyone we dont usually get to see. The ladies and Richie enjoyed dinner at one table, and I came over to ask them if anything was okay. Get it?

The men, surprisingly enough, sat in front of the TV to watch the game while they ate. Sally and I sat at the kids table with Kelly, Tina, Kevin, my dad, and Justin for 34 seconds. One other Thanksgiving tradition is the yearly playing of the game TABOO with Ortiz. He is a magician at the game, in the truest sense of the word, giving clues like "movie stars" and "WHAT??? WHAT???" for phrases like "breast implants." Also, he is rhetorical genius, supplying golden hints like "plants!" and " MAKE IT MAKE IT!!!" for "soil." Last night's hit, of course, was the clue (the only clue) he gave for "Whitney Houston." If I remember correctly, it was "okay . . .she is married to that black jerk from Dorchester." I can't believe I didnt get the answer Dad!

I hope everyone had a terrific day, and we'll be on location more. Look soon for a fresh new video of the cousins fighting each other!!!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

"A Biggatomatosaussa"





That's what we had for dinner last night at Talltrees. And some wine.


Lynne and Aunt June made a delicious homemade tomato sauce with homemade meatballs (June said there were 60 meatballs, but I think that was the Merlot talking . . .haha)


It was delicious, and it was the last time we'll see the Zoo until probably April, when Donna and Keith have their baby. We spent the evening eating delicious food, looking for Stevee Cee's hat, drinking delectable red wine (but not Amanda), and trying to keep Grandpop from kicking everyone out of his house! I got to provide, yet again, a human jungle gym experience for Emma, who, beautifully enough, is in the phase of her childhood development where she focuses most of her attention on two things--playing the "repeat" game where she just repeats everything you say, and trying to work the words "poopie" or "butt" into just about every syntactical sentence she utters. Actually, I'm like that now . . . .


Today is a "getting ready" day, and Sally and I are mostly packed for our yearly trip to the Kranchelsony's in Ledyard CT. A sucky 4 hour ride, but worth it once we are there. I am off today, and I am leaving in a minute to go meet my friend Eric for breakfast at Bee's Diner--a Winslow landmark! After that, I'll begin making my colonial Thanksgiving "onion casserole to bring down. Sally has all the makings for her pumpkin pie all ready to go too--she'll do that in CT. Thomas is pretty much all packed, except for all his toys. Since is is 78 years old now (in cat years) we are trying to usher in more responsibility on his part--he cant rely on Daddy to pack everything for him anymore . . .


Our next blog will be down in CT . . .the Goldsmith's go on location!!!!

Monday, November 19, 2007

Jared Makes An Enemy (its not Emma)




My good friend and colleague Fuzzy Thurston interrupted my class this morning to bring to my attention a letter that made its way into the Kennebec Journal--the other paper that The Morning Sentinel owns (The Morning Sentinel, you may remember, is the paper which published my letter to the editor about laptops not making better writers). The Kennebec Journal just happens to serve the towns of "southern" central Maine--Augusta, Gardiner, Winthrop, Mt. Vernon, etc. Here is the letter:



Jared Goldsmith's letter, "Teachers, not laptops, help students' writing" of Nov. 9 set me off. My spelling and grammar have steadily improved ever since my son built this computer for me. No teacher has been involved with my writing. Most of my writing is snail mail letters to friends of mine.
I'm glad that none of my grandchildren are in Goldsmith's class.

Dana L. Roberts
Winthrop


Here is my reply:


Dear Mr Roberts


1. Your spelling and grammar have not improved at all--because its not YOUR spelling and grammar . . .its the computer's. The computer does all the work for you by automatically changing your errors, so you arent learning anything


2. A teacher could teach you about sentence variety, and how you could have combined your final two sentences with a semicolon--it brings a texture and richness to your writing\


3. How did you learn to read? You are obviously a grandparent (since you are glad your grandkids dont have me). Did computers teach you to read in the 1920's or 30's?


4. A real live teacher could teach you about topic development--something a computer, yet again, cannot do. The reason you could stand to learn a thing or two about topic development is due to the fact that my letter was written about MIDDLE SCHOOL and HIGH SCHOOL students--not some octogenarian who likes to write "snail mail" to his friends when not wintering in Del Boca Vista Florida


5. Why are you glad none of your grandkids are in my class? You know nothing about me, except that I take pride in teaching writing. Are you saying that you dont want your kids to have a teacher who cares about teaching them to write? That is upsetting.

*****


Here is what I would have liked to have included in my letter


1. You're fat

2. I wouldnt have your grandkids anyway--I dont teach special ed

3. I can see your tighty whities because you tuck your shirt into your tighty whities, and they are rising up above the waist of your Navy Blue Dickies pants

4. You're cranky because you're dentures are broken

5. Have fun with your bi-weekly trip to Hannaford, where you'll most likely buy starlight peppermints, canned cat food, and Sanka

6. I'm sorry your son is a computer nerd who still lives in your basement and reads Robert Jordan fantasy novels . . .
7. I'm sorry one of your high school teachers touched you inappropriately where your bathing suit is supposed to cover -- and now you disdain teachers

8. I do love you though. Old people are lovely. Call me. We can snail mail each other


I have too much time on my hands . . . .


We had a great night tonight. I will write more about it tomorrow, but Sally is feeling so much better, so we went to "talltrees" to see the Zoo (talltrees is the name of the Walters estate). Stevee Cee made some DELICIOUS striped bass--just caught in Chesapeake Bay last week. He is an avid fisherman AND cook, and his fish was decadent. Aunt June made some awesome homemade macaroni and cheese. And I pissed everyone off with my political views. So, business as usual. It was great to see Emma, who is growing up so fast, and I look forward to playing more with her tomorrow. MOre to come later . . .

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Jared Gets Big Wood



I have written about my wood many times in previous blogs--FIREWOOD, you disgusting little pigs! Always the pessimist, I began to worry that we wouldn't have enough for the winter (even though we have about 5 cord and we had even less last winter and we were fine). But, as Uncle Karl says, "you can never have enough wood." I called my friend Kevin, from whom I get our firewood. I explained how virtually all we had was gray and white birch, and how we wanted something to "mix in" with the birch--some maple, choke cherry, or, the "golden wood" of them all, oak. Birch, although wonderful for providing root beer flavor, pieces of bark on which to have Sarah Straz write, and the subject line for the finest poem in American Literature (Birches by Frost, of course), is not an ideal firewood. It smells wonderful, burns hot, and is a good hard wood, but, unfortunately, doesnt have the staying power of oak. If I were to put it in terms of sex, birch would be the 14 year old boy "staying home sick" from school, looking at his contraband Hustlers, and oak or maple would be Sting, have tantric with his homely wife--both extremely hot for the first couple of minutes . . .well . . .you get the picture.


So, anyway, we got a super deal on a generous cord of Red Oak, cut from the "Rice Rips Road" in Waterville. At 150 dollars per cord, we truly did get a steal, as just about any other cord of wood up here, this time of year, will run AT LEAST 220 dollars. And, to be honest, I'd rather pay money to support some local Maine woodsman instead of some jihad in dirkadirkastan who rapes Americans for oil. Our oak is even split (well, in big huge chunks anyway . . .I'll have to finesse it a little . . .but I love splitting wood in the winter). Red Oak is awesome, because it is very dense, burns HOT, and burns long.


Sally Piles, in between vomittings, even came outside to see my big wood. My little patient has been doing better today, downing two popsicles, a ginger ale, tons of water, and even some noodle soup I made her by combining egg noodles with chicken broth. We even took a very short walk this evening, and she looks better all around. She does miss her NJ zoo, as we didnt get to go seem them this evening. But hopefully tomorrow.


Only 4 days til' Thanksgiving!!

Saturday, November 17, 2007

A Chicken Salad Day



Grady Little, the unfairly fired Red Sox manager, used to refer to "making due" with what you had as "making chicken salad." Today was one of those days. Two things were supposed to happen today: we were supposed to get our portrait done at Sears this morning (along with Lynne, George, and Jon) but Lynne had a severe migraine, so we did not. Second, we were supposed to go meet the "zoo" (amanda's family from New Jersey--who came up today to stay for Thanksgiving) this afternoon in Readfield. But we didnt; Amanda has been horrendously sick for a couple of days, unable to keep even things like WATER down in her system. Why, just today, she threw up eleven times, and has suffered some dehydration problems. She has just recently gone to bed, and I am going to join her right after i finish this blog.


So, today was a chicken salad day. I had a lot more free time than I thought. I did the recycling, bought some fresh beer (Oak Pond Brewery in Skowhegan, and Thunder Hole Ale from Atlantic Brewing company), swung over to Agway, mulched the pear and maple trees for the winter, brought in a TON of firewood into the garage, and went to buy Amanda a "Wandering Jew" houseplant since she wasnt feeling well--right now it is hanging in Thomases room.


Today I helped Michelle and Chris (along with some of her family) move from their apartment in Winslow to "the Lilac Cottage" in Benton--a beautiful old cape on 100 acres, right across from the "Eames Farm," which is one of my favorite farms in the area. I have a very strict ordinance about ALWAYS helping people move when they ask for help--so many people have helped us in the past, and I think it is good karma to "pay it forward." Let's face it--moving just sucks, and the more support you can offer someone, the better.


Tonight was spent making Lentil Soup with apple chicken sausage, sampling some delicious beer, feeding a hungry wood stove for a chilled wife, and holding Amanda's hair back as she made "street-pizza" in the toilet. I also did a little rehearsal for my concert which is coming up on the 30th (in a week or so). Tomorrow was supposed to be Amanda's concert with the Augusta symphony (she was playing some real heavy Shostakovitch piece) but, with her being sick and all, she has decided to forgo that. I think its for the best. So, tomorrow will be a day to sleep in--or at least until Thomas wakes us up with an ear-drum piercing meow!!

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Meanderings 19




1. When people were trying to invent the square, and they failed, where did they go back to?

2. "Tires" is a misnomer. Tires are the "front line" of any automobile, and they very rarely get "tired." Anything that goes for 40k miles before needing to be replaced shouldnt be called "tire." Thats just not fair.

3. I wonder if anyone has ever kept track of which generation in history pees the most. I know that sounds gross, but think about this: Americans of the 21st century must pee more than any other race on the planet. Ever. Just about everyone (myself included) these days carries around a water bottle of some kind, constantly drinking water. For an era of people supposedly so concerned about saving, protecting, and conserving the environment, we certainly consume a lot of water and create a lot of waste in the form of urine. Soon, they'll say this contributes to global warming.

4. Its funny how Sports stores call their products "goods." Dick's "sporting goods," for example. What's so good about it? JC Penny doesnt sell dress goods or casual goods. And there are some stores, like "Play it again sports" which sell "used" sporting goods. Well if they are used, aren't they "less good" than they used to be? Shouldnt they sell "sporting half-goods?"

5. Men, as usual in this day in age, get the shaft. I was trying to think of all the words I could that start with "man" in front of it. Besides "Manhattan," which is a proper noun, all I thought of was "manipulate," "manner," and "manure." This leads me to believe that all words starting with "man" have negative connotations attached to them. To "manipulate" means to use someone or something for your own purposes. Not good. "Manners" more often than not are bad (impoliteness) in this world, and this carries with it a negative vibe. Finally, "manure" is just a fancy word for shit, so where is the fun in that? How many negative sounding words start with "girl" or "lady?"

6. I bet it would stink to work at a ticker tape factory in any other city but New York or Boston. They have great job security there--all those parades and all. Is ticker tape used for anything else but parades anymore? I bet there is no need for ticker tape in places like Nevada or Ohio where they never win anything--unless they have some secret use for it . . . . . .hmmmm . . . ..

7. Can vegetarians eat Venus Fly Traps? I mean, its a plant, but . . . .

8. I bought some Christmas Candy the other day at Hannaford--it was red and green colored gumdrops. They were stale. Christmas isnt even for like two months, and the candy was stale already??

9. Santa Claus has a Spanish first name and a German last name. That's quite the mix. I wonder which parent was which? I think his looks take after the German side of the family--all that whiteness and all. . . .

10. In the computer world, we call it a "template." This denotes something transient, or short lived, since the word "temp" is right in the name. The Geeks got us again though, because a template is a permanent fixture on a computer that is a permanent "form" you can use to write a letter, do a spreadsheet, etc. A template is an "original," so whats so temporary about that?

11. Why are foods like rice, pasta, and potatoes called "staples?" We don't eat staples do we? Why do they name foods we eat all the time after something we never eat in the first place? If you ate staples that would be silly!

12. Those tongue depressors you see at doctor's offices are nothing more than obese popsicle sticks who couldnt handle it working in the frozen treat industry. In their eyes, which is the more noble profession?

13. Calzones are just pizzas with self confidence issues.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Looking Forward To Turkey Day!

A short post for this morning, since I am at school, in study hall, in the cafe. This time next week, we'll be almost leaving for CT en route to the Kranchelsony estate for Thanksgiving. I think Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday--I love Christmas and all, but I love Thanksgiving because it is the "unofficial" start of the holiday season . . .there is just so much to come! By the way--did you ever notice that the "unofficial" things are usually better than their "official" counterparts? Why dont the unofficial things become official? For example: Memorial Day is the "unofficial" start to the summer season. Well what is the "official" start? Just thinking. This is starting to look like a meanderings . . . .

I think I am making my sherry-creamed onions and Amanda is baking a pumpkin pie. We'll also bring a few gallons of cider from Fairfield's very own Apple Farm; they have fantastic cider. Twon is brining his turkey again this year, like he did last year, and it turned out wonderfully. I can't wait to eat all the stuffed mushrooms he is going to make. It ends up being such a great day because we get to enjoy so much delicious food and see so many people we dont regularly get to see. On a personal note, its special for me, because I get to see both my parents in one location for a holiday--they are divorced, and usually I need to make a couple of trips.

One funny thing about Thanksgiving is how we equate football with the day--even though there are only really two games . . .thats not that much at all really, right? I mean, what's the big deal about two games?

Two of my favorite traditions from when I was a kid was when we watched the Macy's parade on Thursday morning. Also, I remember my mom used to watch all the "Haley Mills" movies (Parent Trap, Pollyanna, etc) on the night before Thanksgiving, after she made her homemade stuffing. I usually peeled all the potatoes, and this has provided years and years of Thanksgiving laughter (about me, of course). I think, though, that I was better at peeling potatoes than covering books. My mom's stuffing was the best--she used Bell's seasoning, real bread, fried onions, and more

What are your favorite Thanksgiving traditions?

Monday, November 12, 2007

Happy Veterans Day



We spent some time with our favorite "veteran" yesterday after church, when we went out to breakfast with Seaman Walters and his bride Edna. Bucky Walters served as a torpedo fireman in the Navy during WWII, and he is very active in sub veterans groups today. Last year, he was inducted into the very prestigious Holland Club--for 50 years service in submarines. Grandpop and I, always health conscious, tried the sausage gravy with biscuits--always a favorite at Bond Brook Diner. After that, Sally and I went to spend our 20 dollar gift certificate at Barnes and Noble by purchasing season 4 of KING OF THE HILL--one of our all time favorite shows.


Today, Monday, was a lazy day, where we relaxed on the couch and watched some episodes of All Creatures Great and Small. We went over to Jo-Ann fabrics and Amanda purchased some material to make two very special Christmas stockings for us. I got to pick out my own fabric because I'm a big boy. Now, its about 630, and I'm headed to the pool--my "cold/darker weather" mode of working out--it takes some of the edge off of chilly black streets (I'm referring to the time of day . . .not the fact that the streets are in Roxbury). I love swimming, and hope to convince Amanda to join me--she used to be quite the swimmer on the swim team when she lived in Tempe Chase, which is right near Cinnaminson . . . .almost near Nikitas, even.


A good four day weekend for sure! This week, although a four day week, will be busy nonetheless---parent conferences tomorrow and Wednesday night. We leave for CT a week from Wednesday, and the Zoo comes up this Saturday.


P.S.--Michelle. Emma. Lynne. June. There.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Moxie Video

Moxie Falls






Jonathan and Mel came by early Saturday morning to join us on a nice day trip up north a bit to The Forks. "The Forks" is the name of a town in Maine, named so because it is the place where the Kennebec and Dead Rivers join--it is prime whitewater rafting country. I love going up there--and its only about an hour from our home on Fairfield. It truly gives you a different perspective of the Kennebec River, as I've mentioned before.


Our first stop was the Northern Outdoors Camp, and I showed everyone where "Raider Society 07" took place--we even took a drive into the very campsite. They loved it and look forward to camping there this summer. From there, drove a bit father north to The Forks "proper," and took a right onto Lake Moxie Road--en route to Moxie Falls. Moxie Falls is an amazing place to go and explore, and I would have had more fun if I was at full strength with my ankle and all--it was difficult to do any walking, and I took it REAL slow.


Moxie Falls was one of our first dates when Amanda and I were first together--it combines beautiful, strong waterfalls with quiet, secluded granite floored pools in which to swim or just sit and bask in the quiet, sun-warmed water. There are even spots where one can go and sit "behind" a waterfall and pretend you are either Elizabeth Shue or Tom Cruise in "Cocktail." (I always pretended I was Shue, so I could make out with Tom Cruise . . .he's so handsome . . . ). But I digress . . . .


We took lots of pictures, and even a couple of movies. I'll try and post the movies. It was so cold yesterday that the mist from the waterfalls rose up and created "rime ice" on some of the tree branches. Pretty neat. We'd like to return in the summer, when the water is isnt quite as fast (we've had a ton of rain lately) and a little warmer, so we can play Tom Cruise again.


After Moxie, we headed up north a bit farther so I could take a picture of "The Enchanted." I did this mostly for my dad, who, like me, is in awe of the fact of what "The Enchanted" actually is. The Enchanted is a camp/guide service/strip club up in the middle of East Bum, Maine. My dad and I often discuss how, although we are not the strip club type, we'd like to visit the establishment to see just what types of "women" they get to strip in The Forks. Anyway, there is a picture of it--as you can see, it doesnt look like a strip club . . .it looks like a grandmother's house.


Lunch was at Northern Outdoors, as I mentioned before. Northern Outdoors is an awesome "north woods camp" that really lets its guest rough it by providing outdoor hot tubs, an arcade, a pool, an indoor tennis court, and more. Seriously though, it is a really great place to go and visit, camp, raft, snowmobile, or hunt. Oh, and its also a microbrewery--Kennebec River Brewing Company. I tried the Loggerhead Lager, and Sport Jonathan tried the Magic Hole IPA. Excellent beer . . .in fact, Loggerhead might be one of my top three beers now. Look for it.


FINALLY . . .we got home and I made a nice roaring fire for Thomas and Mel. I got my famous (according to Mel) split pea soup and ham going. Sally talked to Aunt June, her mom, and grandmom. Jon and I took a ride to Joka's to pick up some fresh beer. Then, we ended a great day by watching White Christmas (Amanda's ALL TIME favorite movie). This was the first viewing, and I'm sure we'll watch 2 or 3 more times before the actual holiday (I know we'll do it down in CT next week for Thanksgiving, as Kris has never seen it, and Twon loves musicals--particularly RENT).


A good day we had! We look forward to the winter, when the Goldsmiths, Melathans, and KRanthonys may start a new tradition of a ski trip--I can't wait to take Twon on the black diamond trails of Sunday River . . . I love teaching people how to ski, and I think he's ready to learn

Friday, November 9, 2007

Comp Day Ramblings





Two posts in one day!!!


I had today off, as it is a comp day for the teachers of the high school. Next week, we have parent teacher conferences from 4-730 after school on Tuesday and Wednesday, so they gave us today off. Cool. I began the day by watching "Today" with Matt Lauer. I got into the show because Campbell Brown is hot, but she's not on the program anymore. Here are the three stories they covered in the NATIONAL HEADLINES!!!!!


1. Pakistan is being blown up, and a civil war is all but ensuing


2. OJ Simpson is in court again on armed robbery charges.


3. Jesse Jackson (my number 2 least favorite person in America after Bush) is 66 years old or something. Michael Jackson (no relation . . .I think) was there at the party, and NBC showed 5 seconds worth of coverage of the king of pop "conducting" people in the singing of "Happy Birthday."


Is this really all that is happening in the world? The Pakistan story is legitimate, but is there really nothing else besides OJ and Jesse Jackson? I'm surprised Lindsey Lohan didnt take a dump or something--that would have been pretty newsworthy too, I guess.


***


I cleaned out the wood stove for the first time of the season. What a pain that is. All that ash gets all over the house. Speaking of which--do you know how to kill an elephant?? Its easy. First, you dig a huge hole that is big enough to hold an elephant. Then you fill that hole with wood ash. THEN, you line the perimeter of the hole with peanuts. Get it???


When the elephant goes over to take a peanut, you kick him in the ashhole!!!! WAH WAH WAH


***


I went to the chiro today to have him fix my ankle. It worked. Seriously. He got it to "release," which means pop, and things are aligned nicely now. It still hurts though, so I went into the pool for further therapy. I love swimming at the Holiday Inn Fitness Center because I love flirting with the voluptuous octogenarians


***


Thomas is back to sleeping in the cat bed his Nannie got him 3 years ago. When he was sick--before he started his great medication--he used to throw up a lot, and one day he threw up all over his bed. He ignored his cat bed for probably 2 years, but today he decided to start sleeping in it again. How cute!


***


I shaved my beard off. Usually I grow it in the winter, but I'm just not feeling it this year. What do you think? Not that I give a crap or anything . . . .


***


I wrote two new songs today, which is always a rush. Its an amazing blessing to be able to compose one song in a week . . .but two in one day??!!??? I am trying to create some new material because I have a big show coming up on November 30. I'll be playing at the Winslow Junior High Auditorium as a fund raiser for the senior class. Anyone and everyone is invited--you should come up and see my show. It is on a Friday. You can sleep over at Jarey's place. You'll be guaranteed your own bathroom, a warm woodstove fire, and even Belgium Waffles courtesy of Amanda when you wake up on Saturday. Kranthony is coming, right??


***


Dont forget to read my previous post and check out my letter to the editor!




Jared Gets Published


In the newspaper, anyway . . . .


"The Morning Sentinel," our Maine newspaper, is overtly anti-Winslow High School, and I believe guilty of muckraking and sensationalism. They reported inaccurately on the alleged "strip search" that "occurred" at my school, and they have published just about every chintzy letter to the editor from a myriad of anti-Terry Atwood people out to seek their vendetta against him.


A few weeks ago, on October 24th to be exact, they published a story about some "research" done by the University of Southern Maine, asserting that the Maine Laptop Initiative was to credit for the increase in Maine students' writing scores on standardized tests. You can google the news story if you want--I wont bore you with details. Anyway, this upset me a great deal; lately, it seems as if teachers have been nothing but lambasted for everything that goes wrong in education. I wrote a letter to the editor explaining my frustration, and, although 3 weeks or so later, it was published. You can go to http://www.onlinesentinel.com/ and click on "opinion" and scroll down to see my letter. OR . . .you can just read below.

************************************


This letter is written in response to the Oct. 24 article "Laptops aid pupils' writing." The article forwards the idea that giving a laptop to every middle school student is leading to better writing scores on "standardized tests." As an educator, I find this article both upsetting and disrespectful to my profession.

Technology -- of any type -- is merely a tool; it is not the "be all end all" of anything and it certainly shouldn't be praised for supposedly raising writing scores. How about crediting the teachers who work incessantly "in the trenches," so to speak, as the reason for the increase in writing scores?

In the media, it seems status quo to blame the teachers for when things go wrong and scores are low. Finally, there is good news and the laud goes to an $1,100 computer (which, by the way, high school students don't have -- and let's not forget it's the high school juniors who take these ridiculous state-standardized writing tests in the form of the SAT).

Crediting a laptop for producing better writers is just silly. Simply running spell check does not a better writer make, and the "grammatical suggestions" a computer gives often befuddle the modern conventions of English. There simply is just no substitute for having a teacher's professional expertise (human expertise) when instructing students, of all grade levels, how to write well. My colleagues and I work tirelessly to produce better writers, and I think it's time we are recognized.

Jared Goldsmith M.Ed.
Teacher of English
Winslow High School

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Hector Williams



I stand corrected.

For a long time, I was one who poked fun at the sort of person who was a disciple of a certain type of show—the type who just “had” to be home to see “Friends,” or couldn’t live without Tivo-ing “Lost” or “CSI.” GET A LIFE, I used to think. How can one be so attached to a television show?

I, too, am now guilty. And I have spent most of the day trying to figure out why.

As far as I am concerned, there are two television shows worth watching—NCIS and THE UNIT. Both air on Tuesday nights, making that evening sacrosanct for Amanda and me. The Unit, this season, has defied all expectations of what a television program should be like; it seems to possess the perfect balance of absolutely riveting story lines, twisty plot sequences, and pristinely cast characters.

I spent from 10:00 to 11:00 (until I went to bed), two concrete dreams, and most of my downtime today trying to understand why, after the credits rolled at the conclusion of the show, I found myself teary eyed over the death of one of the characters on the show.

It came as such a shock; it was the ultimate “I’ve played a joke on you” director’s strategy—divert your attention for the duration of the episode, and then completely baffle you at the end . . .blindside you and make an impact. Hector, an amiable and compassionate special ops soldier, nurses his wounded comrade back to life, only to be taken, instantly, by a sniper’s rifle in the last minute of the show.

Why do we feel so strongly about fictional characters--professional athletes, even? A college professor at UNH once lectured on “parasocial relationships”—that is, when WE as “concrete” and real human beings become so attached to things that are mere “stories;” things that don’t really exist in our concrete world. Basically, these are people who will never actually care about you the way you think you care about them. I know several of my college friends who cried when “Friends’” last episode aired on television, and I remember SEVERAL high school kids at OAHS who, essentially, held novenas when Kurt Cobain shot himself.

Did Kurt know these kids? Did Jennifer Aniston really care about all her fans as she laughed all the way to the bank? Will Hector Williams of “The Unit” take solace in the fact that I cried over his fake death on a one hour weeknight drama? I doubt it. In fact, definitely not. Yet, perhaps the trouble I had today stems from the fact that I felt like I truly lost someone very close to me.

And this is what makes me nervous. And embarrassed.

I explained it to my dad over the phone tonight: I really had a difficult time today, and I felt like I experienced a real death. Now, I realize I am putting this out on cyberspace, and I realize I must look ridiculous spending an otherwise perfect Wednesday bachelor night writing about my feelings, but I think this issue begs the question of what these types of parasocial relationships say about our TRUE interpersonal relationships. I fear that in a technological age, these might be the only relationships some people have. How sad. And what does it say about our compassion as true human beings? Are we missing out on person to person contact? Do we channel this neediness for love and affection and acceptance into something that doesn’t even really exist?

I’m still trying to figure it out. . .

Monday, November 5, 2007

Mostly Maniacal Monday


So the Christmas season is definitely upon us. Already. CRAP-M (what I call XM) radio is playing its 6 or so Christmas stations already. And a couple of stations in Maine are playing all Christmas music all the time. Jeez . . .we only have a couple of radio stations in Maine anyway!


Applebees is advertising their gift cards for holiday presents, and QVC has been in Christmas mode since about late August.


What does it all mean?


More rain is supposed to reach us by tomorrow. That's good by me.


I had a chiropractor appointment after school today--it feels so good to get adjusted and aligned. Some might say that Chiropractors are quacks and not real doctors and that the only way they make their money is by constantly having you back to see them and get readjusted. I disagree with those statements. I love the fact that it is so un-invasive and natural. Furthermore, I am a fan of how there are no drugs involved (I've had enough drugs inside me, thank you). I buy into the idea of the body's ability to heal itself naturally without the help of drugs. True, chiros might have you back constantly to get adjusted, but how is that any different than the doctor having you "go back constantly" to the pharmacy to get a prescription refilled.


Please dont get me wrong: I love doctors (and PA's Fuzzy). They are miracle workers and deserve every cent they get paid. I love the doctor Sally and I have now, and all my Oncologists were amazing. Its the drug companies I am afraid of. And its just that I like to have options, other than the "traditional route," when it comes to my own body.


I'm gonna go have a beer.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Meanderings 18




1. The Pentagon doesnt recognize the word "torture." To them, its called "pain compliance" or "pain inspiration." Furthermore, just in case you didnt know, the United States doesnt "technically" have "bombs." Rather, we use "vertically deployed anti personnel devices." This is serious. I recently finished teaching a unit on "doublespeak" in my public speaking class. I'll write more about it later.


2. In the restaurant/food industry world, "assorted" is a fancy word for "leftovers." For example, the UNH dining hall used to have "assorted" desserts--which just meant that you were getting whatever you didnt finish over the course of the last two days . . .


3. I think my name should be printed anytime a group photo is taken and, in parentheses, it says "not pictured are . . . ." and lists names. Its true, right? Your name should be there too, in fact.


4. This generation of young people have become totally desensitized to the wonder of what was, when I was younger, stellar technology. Ask any kid if they think landing on the moon was an amazing accomplishment in recent history---they probably don't; we've gone so much further since then. I wasnt born yet when we first went to the moon, but I remember very clearly hunkering in a big group, near the end of lunch in 5th grade, trying to get a glimpse of Matt Severson's 2 inch portable TV (a marvel in itself) to watch a space shuttle liftoff. Space shuttle liftoffs, when I was younger, were amazing events that were broadcast on TV and watched by many. When was the last time they interrupted regular programming for THAT in recent memory?


5. Why does "French" onion soup have "Swiss" cheese melted on top?


6. Does the "French" describe the "onion," or the "style" of the dish in general? I ask this because there is also French onion dip. I, for one, am sick of being dinked around by the French.


7. The container of salt I have in my cabinet says on the side that there are 560 milligrams of sodium per serving. Shouldnt it be 100%? Doesnt that seem right? How can "salt" not be 100% sodium? Salt IS sodium. In a can of tomato juice (a "health" drink no less) there are well over 700 milligrams of sodium per serving. How does this happen? What else is in salt? Again, I am sink of being dinked around by the French.


8. I find it so ironic that some people spend so much time and money on equipment and materials for SCRAPbooking. Scrapbooking is a misnomer. What's next? A Feng Shui junkyard? Isnt the whole IDEA that its a book in which to put SCRAPS of memories, etc? Some people might spend an hour on one page . . .tweaking photos, captions, spacing, fonts, etc to be just right. Some people might be my wife.


9. Did you ever notice that most all commercial airline pilots look the same? They are pretty well typecast: the 50-something white male with salt and pepper hair (never bald) and confident eyes. Usually, they are at least 6 foot 1.


10. Plumbers and IT computer people are pretty much the same. Except, in my opinion, the IT people get all the big money and benefits because THEIR lines transport information, not poop.


On second thought, they're the same.


11. If I was a REALLY REALLY rich guy with lots of money and resources, and I wanted to be a REALLY REALLY big jerk, then I would most likely blow up the moon. Think of all the damage this would do. Notwithstanding completely messed up ocean tides and calendars, I think it would be a pretty big moral blow to mankind as well. I'm surprised terrorists havent thought of blowing up the moon yet.


What's more is this: If I was that REALLY REALLY big jerk who blew up the moon, what type of recourse could any sovereign country have against me? I couldnt be in any trouble. After all, who owns the moon? No one has any control of it. It doesnt exist in any part of our "world," even. That would really tick the liberals off, huh? They'd have no one to blame. (let the comments begin . . .ha ha) As far as I'm concerned, the moon is fair game.